


Stupid Traditions!

by ThunderFrost2012



Series: Stupid Christmas Time! [2]
Category: Jessica Jones (TV)
Genre: A tiny bit of romance, Christmas, Christmas Caroling, Christmas Decorations, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Lunch, Christmas Presents, Christmas Tree, F/M, Fireplaces, Funny, Hurt/Comfort, Jessica can be a pain in the ass, Killgrave with children, Sad Memories, Santa Claus Suit, Sequel, Surprises, Unresolved Sexual Tension, at least i hope so, believe me those two can be fluff and fun, but Kevin loves her anyway, did I say poor Kevin?, did i say fluff?, hints of mutual attraction, if he tries really really hard, jessica jones can't cook, killgrave can be good, killgrave can be good when he wants, killgrave must be very very patient, kissing under mistletoe, lol, maybe not so appreciated, more bantering, more craziness to come, more fun to come, oh c'mon Killgrave deserved it, poor kevin, poor sweet Kevin, told you I am crazy, yeah I am crazy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-19
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:48:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22807351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThunderFrost2012/pseuds/ThunderFrost2012
Summary: Summary: Jessica has a plan and Kevin is about to spend an unforgettable Christmas.Sequel of ‘Stupid Mistletoe!’This fic is inspired by this prompt of this (Italian) Xmas song challenge:general: 'X decides to ruin Y's Christmas'chapter I: Christmas Carolchapter II: decorating Christmas treechapter III: wrapping a garland around someone's neckfrom chapter I:*“Wait a minute. Kevin, what if you order even what you sing? I mean, if we sing ‘Go, Tell It On The Mountain' … it’s not that we’ll have tons of people climbing mountains and hills to announce that Jesus is born… is it?” the brunette frowns.Kevin bursts out laughing, due to the absurdity of that hypothesis.“Noo…” He reassures her. “Well,, I’ve never ordered anything singing… it’s not that I sing quite often, after all.” He becomes absorbed in doubts, especially if he thinks about his increased power. “Well, please, don’t leave me the solo parts!” He requests as a reasonable compromise.“Let’s remove that song from the play-list!” Jessica finds an even wiser solution. “And also ‘Oh, Come, all ye Faithful', I don’t want mass migration to Bethlem!” *
Relationships: Jessica Jones/Kevin Thompson, Jessica Jones/Zebediah Killgrave, Jessica/Killgrave
Series: Stupid Christmas Time! [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1600813
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	1. I: AKA Little Black Riding Hood and the Bad Wolf

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: all characters belong just and only to Marvel, I gain no money writing that. This time I’m even crazier (Kevin, please, forgive me, if you can… but I apologize to all characters, more or less).

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)  
  


**Chapter I: AKA Little Black Riding Hood and the Bad Wolf**  


“It’s madness!” Patricia roars.  
“Couldn’t you be just a bit more supportive?” Jessica rolls her eyes at the roof, as she fiddles with the zipper of her commando boot, sprawled on her sofa.  
  
Trish can’t relax her same way, quite the contrary, she walks back and forward, in the few space that narrow corridor allows.  
  
“You’re right, I’ve always supported you, in everything you do, why should it be different this time?” She smiles at her sister, in a reassuring way. “Because it’s an exorbitant, unjustified, reckless madness!” She snaps, with all the reproaching tone she can munster.  
  
Tired of all that walking, she lets herself fall on a chair, nearby.  
  
“It’s almost as if Little Red Riding Hood … no, wait, Black, considering your colours, lost her mind, going willingly to the Bad Wolf to let him devour her!” Patricia adds, after some minutes of silence.  
“It’s a Bad Wolf who keeps saying he quit the habit,” Jessica strikes back, getting up to reach her best friend. “I have to figure out how far he can go. His charade at the shopping centre didn’t fully convince me. I must find out if it’s all an act… or if he’s really trying to prove me something. I already know what I have to do.” The detective informs her, as stubborn as ever.  
“Are you going to spend the whole Christmas Day with him, are you?” Her sister repeats, still unbelieving.  
  
“Yep. Killgrave himself gave me this idea… and he also already let me know about his new address.” The brunette announces.  
“It’s not a good reason to go there!”  
“It’s a fucking good reason. I know what I’m doing. I have a plan, A good plan, much better than when I wanted to be a prisoner in that maximum security prison.”  
“Anything would be better than that plan!” Trish grumbles.  
  
“Are you admitting that this one is a good plan?” Jessica pleads the cause, persistent as and even worse than a door-to-door salesman. “Oh, c’mon, Trish, nothing bad is going to happen, I know how to defend!”  
  
“I just know that nothing is going to make you change your mind, so… if you really want to take that leap in the dark… at least do it with a parachute.” Patricia enigmatically answers.  
  
She picks her bag, where she draws out a sort of silver torch, with two odds extremities.  
  
“A taser?” Jessica figures out, not very enthusiastically  
“Oh, no please, don’t reduce it to only this. It’s so much more than a simple taser. Hit Killgrave with this and he’s going to sleep until 2020! Not to mention that it’s extremely painful.” she explains, handing that powerful weapon to her. “Wil gave it to me, in case some Killgraved people attacked me.” She explains.  
“Okay, if it makes you feel more comfortable, I’ll take your little toy with me!” Jessica accepts her offer.  
“It’s supposed to make _you_ feel more comfortable!” The blonde strikes back.  
  
“Is it your way to give the green light?” The brunette investigates.  
“Do I have any other alternative’” Trish gives in.  
“Nope, you just have to trust me. And help me with the purchases, too… and maybe also to bring all the stuff to Killgrave’s house.”  
  
“What stuff? What purchases are you talking about? Jess, what are you planning?” The speaker frowns.  
“Oh, you’ll see. But we’ll think about that tomorrow. We still have two days to do everything.” Her friend explains.  
“You’re right, I guess I should go sleep. It’s 1:00 a.m.” Trish grabs her stuff, wearing her coat.  
“I didn’t ask you to rush to my house and ask me how the meeting with Killgrave was.” Jessica points out.  
“Sorry, I was too curious to wait for next morning.” Her friend chuckles.  
“Anyway, Trish, I’m going to involve you in a particular phase of my plan.” Jessica informs her, walking her to the door.  
“Alright! You know I’m always up for some thrilling action!” The blonde grins.  
“Uhmm yeah.. action.” The brunette repeats, with a hint of mystery.  


\---------------------------------------   
  
“Out of the bed, Kevin! And smile, it’s Christmas!” Jessica yells, at the top of her lungs, once she found his bedroom.  
  
After all, it was a piece of cake for her to pick the lock of the security door and temporarily get rid of Killgrave’s whole entourage so now she can walk around that bedroom undisturbed.  
  
Beyond the king size bed, there are two big cupboards, probably plenty of all his oh-so-elegant suits. There’s a mahogany desk close to the window and there’s an armchair with a perfectly ironed and folded shirt and next to it there’s a dark blue cashmere jumper.  


\- _Few, essential things … placed in a maniacal order. This is totally Kevin. I’m just surprised that there’s nothing purple around here… probably he had not enough time to personalize the house._ \- Jessica ponders.  


After her ‘gentle’ raid, Kevin can only jolt awake, rather bewildered. He stares at her, among dreamy attitude and disbelief, but even a bothered attitude, when he glances at his alarm clock that informs him that it’s only 7:30 a.m..  
  
At first, he asks himself if he’s dreaming all of it.  
  
\- _Nope, the Jessica of my dreams would sneak under the sheets, slide closer to me and then she would start to kiss me, first on the mouth, then on my neck, my chest, lower and lower, giving me the best morning wake up, ever._ \- he daydreams, and yet he hasn’t said a single word.  


He sits up, with his back resting against the headboard of the bed, revealing that he’s bare-chested.  
He stares better at her.  
  
\- _Besides, the Jessica of my dreams would be less dressed than this and dressed infinitely better than this!_ \- he keeps musing and grimaces, wrinkling his nose at the sight of her outfit.  
  
The girl is wearing one of those classic Christmas sweaters, of heavyweight woollen fabric.It’s very large, covering all her curves, it’s red but with a black bottom and a strip in the middle that reminds of the snowflakes, with matches even the edges of the sleeves.  
  
In the meantime also Jessica is in full paranoia.  
  
\- _He’s bare-chested. Why the fucking hell is he bare-chested? It’s Winter, for God’s sake! People are supposed to sleep fully dressed in Winter. Will he have other bared-parts? Dammit, Jessica, stop staring at his chest! Yeah, it’s true, you kissed it countless times, but it was only because he ordered you that… but he never asked me to bite those yummy nipples… NO, Jess, stay focused on the Christmas Nightmare mission!_ \- she scolds herself.  
  
“So, doesn’t you speak anymore? What, Santa’s elves stole your tongue?” she snorts, growing nervous due to his silence.  
  
\- _Yeah, this is the real Jessica. No doubt about it!_ \- Kevin acknowledges, before smiling at her.  
  
“Good Morning, my darling. I’m not going to even ask you how you managed to get in. So, did you really choose to un-celebrate Christmas with me? Well, it means that I must have done something good, after all, if Santa Claus makes my dreams come true.” He murmurs, rubbing his eyes to wake up better.  
  
“It’s more likely that Satan decided to turn your nightmares into reality!” Jessica hisses, acidly, crossing her arms against her chest.  
  
That gesture lifts a bit her sweater, revealing a tiny and sensual strip of bared stomach between it and her blue jeans.  
Kevin stares at it, fascinated.  
  
“Before you get up, you’re not naked under there, are you?” The detective inquires.  
  
Kevin displays a sly smile, pushing away the sheets, abruptly, revealing that he’s wearing the pants of his pijama.  
“As you just saw, nope, my darling, but it’s something I can fix very soon, if you want!”  
“In your dreams!” Jessica snaps, but truth is that she’s relieved.  
  
\- _Don’t worry, I’m about to dress you good and proper!_ \- She ponders, leaving the room, under the owner of the house’s puzzled gaze.   
  
He takes advantage of her short absence to change his clothes with more classic dark blue trousers.  
  
For some reasons, noticing his guest’s previous interest, he remains bare-chested.  
  
Jessica comes back, holding a rectangular package, wrapped in a colourful paper.  
  
“For me? Awww, that’s so sweet from you. If you have a present for me, this can’t be a nightmare.” He beams, taking the box from her hands.  
  
“Just open it, before judging.” She smirks threateningly.  
  
Once he opened it, Kevin figures out what Jessica meant.  
  
He’s holding a Christmas sweater very similar to hers: heavyweight woollen fabric, with red and black stripes.  
  
“It is a joke, isn't it?” He growls, throwing it at her face.  
“I don’t think so, my dear dandy!” She strikes back, smugly. “Oh, c’mon, I could have been so eviler: you know, there were such adorable jumpers with reindeers, Christmas trees and snowmen!” She reveals, as he makes a horrified face.

“The hell with un-celebrate Christmas, quite the contrary, I decided I’m going to celebrate it in every of its stupid traditions! And you will do the same, with me!” she anticipates, with a sadistic sneer.  
“Now you’re terrifying me more than the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future put together!” He pretends to be afraid and then chuckles.  
  
She stares at him astonished.  
  
“Do you really know _‘A Christmas Carol’_?”  
“Of course I do. I’ve read it more than once and watched it on TV, in every possible version. I would be a perfect Ghost of Christmas Present: very elegant, sober, sophisticated and… terrifying!” The enchanter swaggers.  
  
“Just like the way you are!” She rolls her eyes at the roof and then she points at his jumper. “Okay, save for the elegant part, maybe.”  
“Aha-ha, you’re so witty. I won’t remain with this…” He pauses, not to blow a gasket and use a foul language to describe what he’s wearing. “This thing for long. You know.” He goes on.  
“Well, to play a fantastic ghost you just miss to make your earthly life end. Give me a shout, I can be very helpful if you need that!” She enjoys a lot teasing him that way.  
“Sure, at your own peril; if you make me become a ghost, I’ll spend my eternity tormenting you…” He declares, posing like a classic ghost.  
  
“Now it’s me trembling at that eventuality!” She chuckles. “Shut up, Ghost of Christmas Present wanna-be and constant hassle of every single moment of my life and follow me outside” she exhorts him, trotting down the stairs.  
“Outside means in the garden… right?” He wavers, following her with a slower pace.  
  
Speaking of ghosts, judging by the fear that’s overwhelming him, Kevin could have a stroke or real.  
  
“Nope, you moron, outside means in the streets, we’re going to sing Christmas Carol door to door!” She informs him, with a very disquieting cheerful attitude, opening the security door.  
“We are going to do… what?! Dressed like this? NO! No bloody way!” He retains his position, closing the door again.  
“What part of Christmas Nightmare didn’t you get? This is only the beginning! Oh well, unless you don’t want me to leave…” She blackmails him, as sneaky as ever, well aware that she has him wrapped around her finger.  
Hell yeah she knows.  


“Okay, okay, let’s go following all these stupid traditions!” He gives in, slamming the door violently in order to mark his annoyance. “Although no one ever saw a duo singing Christmas Carol; we’ll be ridiculous, even more than we already are.” he grumbles, as they walk.  
  
He’ll never admit it to Jessica, but that horrible jumper keeps him really wam.  
“You have your point, the duo would be ridiculous…” She says, turning at a corner, where there’s someone waiting for them.  
“That’s why we’ll be a lovely quartet!” Jessica proudly states, pointing at him a not very enthusiastic Malcolm and a pissed off Trish.  
  
“When you said there would be some action, that’s _not_ what I was thinking about!” the blonde retorts, narrowing her blue eyes in an icy glare.  
“I’ve just said I was going to involve you, I’ve never specified what kind of action it would be.” The brunette defends.  
“At least she said something to you, Trish! I’m still wondering what I’m doing here.” The black boy whines, before turning to his condominium. “I just know that I opened your stupid gift and followed all the instructions on the card: to wear it and come here, around this time, with the lyrics sheets.” Malcolm grumbles.  
“The lyrics sheets?” Kevin stares suspicious at them, before Trish - Jessica decided she would be the one engaged for that mission - draws out from her rucksack the sheets with the lyrics of the most popular Christmas songs, handing them to Jessica and Killgrave.  
  
“So we are really doing that.” Killgrave mutters.  
“Oh, someone is as excited as I am, I see!” Patricia makes him smile, before he stares better at her and the Afro- American.  
  
Trish wears a red jumper with white reindeers, Malcolm wears a red one with white snowmen and blue sledges.  
  
“You know, I really start thinking that you had more regard for me.” He whispers to Jessica.  
  
“Told you so. Our jumpers match. They are … what’s that word you always use to define us? Oh, yeah… inevitable!” she replies, as ironic as ever.  
  
“I still don’t get it, why Jessica wants you here? However, I don’t fear you anymore, Killgrave, I’ve cleaned up for months, I’m done with that shit. There’s nothing else you can do to control me now.” Malcolm challenges the enchanter.  
“Do you really think so?” Killgrave sneers, plucky.  
  
Jessica intervenes just like a Kindergarten teacher when two kids are arguing.  
  
“You don’t tease him!” She reproaches Malcolm, before turning to Kevin. “And, you, if you try something funny I have such a powerful taser that, compared to that, you parents’ experiments are tickling!” She warns him, showing him the torch she’s hiding in the middle pocket of her jumper.  
  
“Oh, that’s such a nice little toy…” Kevin says, quietly. “It seems so… military!” He underlines the last word, casting an eloquent look towards Patricia.  
  
“Okay, okay, it’s a gift from my former boy who played the Super Soldier way too much and these are the consequences!” The blonde faces him smugly, making him smile.  
  
She can’t help noticing that both Jessica and Killgrave called that ultimate super sophisticated technologic weapon ‘little toy’  
  
- _I shouldn’t let Jessica notice how similar they are!_ -  
  
“You took precautions, you’re not stupid!” the mind-controller chuckles. “But I’m behaving and I'm going to keep behaving,” He adds, with incredible patience.  
  
“As long as there’s your girlfriend putting a muzzle on you you’re going to behave for sure!” Malcolm comments.  
  
Despite the definitely-not-tropical climate, the blood boiled in Jessica’s veins and her face gets red.  
  
“What the fuck did you just say?” She roars, as ‘polite’ as always.  
  
“Save for the muzzle part, I really like the scenario you described!” Kevin gloats.  
  
“Killgrave, order him not to speak anymore, I authorise you. After all, it’s nothing evil, just something he definitely deserves!” Jessica suggests, glaring at Malcolm.  
  
“But… you need me … we must sing!” The neighbor try to reason with her.  
  
Jessica whispers something in Kevin’s ear.  
  
“Are you sure I can?” he asks her.  
“I take full responsibility, so … have fun!” she gives him the go-ahead.  
  
Kevin approaches Malcolm who starts fearing the worst.  
  
“You won’t open your mouth anymore untl we start the first song.” he orders him, perentory, loading every syllable with all his charism.  
  
Malcolm listens to him, defenseless, and then, no matter how hard he tries, he just can’t part his lips, although they are not physically sealed.

  
“Now it’s better!” Jessica smirks.  
  
“I missed this so much, such amazing feeling!” Kevin sneers.  
  
“Oh, please, shut up and don’t develop a taste for that, this was only the exception that proves the rule!” She immediately shoulders the mantle of the leadership.  
  
Kevin raises his hands, meaning that he got the message.  
  
Trish observes them, silently.  
  
\- _The hell with the redemption, those two are a criminal conspiracy!_ -  
  
They’re about to reach the first house, but something occurs to Jessica.  
  
“Wait a minute. Kevin, what if you order even what you sing? I mean, if we sing ‘ _Go, Tell It On The Mountain_ ' … it’s not that we’ll have tons of people climbing mountains and hills to announce that Jesus is born… is it?” the brunette frowns.  
  
Kevin bursts out laughing, due to the absurdity of that hypothesis.  
  
“Noo…” He reassures her. “Well,, I’ve never ordered anything singing… it’s not that I sing quite often, after all.” He becomes absorbed in doubts, especially if he thinks about his increased power. “Well, please, don’t leave me the solo parts!” He requests as a reasonable compromise.  
“Let’s remove that song from the play-list!” Jessica finds an even wiser solution. “And also ‘ _Oh, Come, all ye Faithful'_ , I don’t want mass migration to Bethlem!”   
“Let’s make him sing only ‘ _Jingle Bells'_ , ' _Silent Night'_ , ' _Rudolph, The Red- Nosed Reindeer_ ' and other songs that can’t make any damage, but let’s hurry up, poor Malcolm is about to explode!” Trish decides for everyone and she sounds very convincing.  
  
They ring at the first bell and the first door is opened.   
A family joyfully welcomes them, ready to listen to them.

Three singers out of four smile. Simply, one of them can’t open his mouth yet, until ‘Silent Night’ starts and Malcolm’s short nightmare finally is over.  
  
Every performance is a success and there’s no collateral effect on people who listen to Killgrave. Quite the contrary, he sings rather good.  
  
“Have you ever thought about quit all the psycho control freak stuff and try with a singer carrier? If you record a single I could release it during my radio show.” Trish suggests but Kevin doesn’t buy it.  


At the third block, after the twelfth performance, the quartet decides it’s enough and their ways split.  
  
Well, a certain duo is still walking along the same path, because the day Jessica planned is only at the beginning.  
So far Kevin seems to react surprisingly good to all her teasing, but Jessica still have more tricks up her sleeves.  
  
TBC  



	2. II: AKA My door’s always open… in the literal sense!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fireplace, bantering, Christmas lunch, Christmas tree and much more ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for the kudos, keep it coming <3 if you reaaallllly want to make me smile, leave a tiny comment, too ^^' <3

[](https://imgbb.com/)  
  
  
**II: AKA My door’s always open… in the literal sense!**  
  
“Home, sweet home.” Jessica sing-songs, as ironic as ever, as Killgrave turns the key in the lock, uselessly, it seems.  
“I’d rather say ‘Door, dead door’!” Kevin snaps. “I don’t even know why I bothered to close it before, since it doesn’t bloody work anymore!” He states the facts, moving the door back and forward, relentlessly.  
  
“It’s also true that, before we went out, you shut it really hard, in order to express your deep disappointment.” Jessica points out with all the fake innocence she can munster.  
“Don’t you dare to even hint it’s my fault, Miss door-cracker!” Killgrave retorts. “Did you really need to make it unserviceable? If you had texted me you were coming, I would have run downstairs to open the door for you, wearing my best smile.” He adds with a artifact, smooth tone.  


“And spoil the surprise effect? Naaah.” She shakes her head. “What a fucking bore! All this fuss for a door… I’ll send you a blacksmith in two days, happy now?” She rolls her eyes.  
“Hell no, I’m not bloody happy, what about today? Who is going to look after me? You even deprived me of my staff!” He points out, disappointed. “By the way, would you please bother to tell me where did you take them?”  


“I’ve put them all in your garage. All sleeping happily. Or maybe someone could be awake now, but still everyone in your garage, that should be soundproofed if I’m not wrong.” She exclaims.  
“A dozen of people crammed in my box … poor people, that’s an awful Christmas!” Kevin says, in deep disapproval.  
“Don’t play the compassionate guy with me; you’ve been keeping them far from their families for months, to make them service you!” She accuses him.  
  
She never misses the opportunity of blaming him for something.  
  
“And that’s where you’re wrong, my dear. None of them has a family. I always chose people with no bonds. Alone. Like me.” He explains with a bitter smile.  
“They don’t have a family?” She repeats, rather astonished, also for that smile of Killgrave’s, so unusual.  
His features most of the time display cheekiness, cockiness and derision.  


“You heard it right. And before you even dare to think that, nope, they didn’t lose their families due to my intervention, they were already alone when I found them.” He clarifies. “I am their family, by now.” He adds, after a short pondering suggested by his huge ego.  
“Well, I guess they’ll be happy if I made them orphan for one day!” Jessica strikes back, now as keen as usual, but only because Killgrave did the same. And she’s silently thankful to him for that, because she doesn’t know how to deal with his most vulnerable state.  
  
“Ouch. Low blow, Missy, I can’t forgive you for that.” Killgrave pretends to be hurt.  
  
“However, I have been having a broken door for months and I couldn’t live better than this, you should know, counting all your incursions to my house…” The beautiful brunette retorts, her tone growing sourer.  
“Counting all of them… big words. There was only a couple of incursions from me.” He adds, smugly, while he scratches his cheekbone with his mouth open, as if he had to think about it.  
“They are already way too many for me. In case you plan the third one, text me before, so I can open the door for you, maybe not wearing a smile, I’m more inclined to a punch that breaks your nose… after all, isn’t it the same thing at the very end?” She smirks impudently.  
“Geez, Jessica, isn’t Christmas supposed to warm your heart, at least a tiny bit?” He tries to make her feel guilty.  
“Christmas is only freezing my ass!” is the ‘sensitive’ answer he receives.  
“Very nice ass!” Killgrave clearly shows his appreciation, turning to admire her tight and round glutes, wrapped in her light blue jeans.  
“Shut up, pig!” She snaps, bringing him to heel. “Cracked door or not, can we please go inside?”  
  
Since the door was already open, Jessica doesn’t think twice and steps inside the house.  
Killgrave follows her and once he crossed the threshold he does something he considers necessary.  
After all, they’re done with the Carol thing.  
  
“Finally, I couldn’t have stand this thing over me a second longer!” He growls, taking off the hideous Christmas jumper as fast as he can and throwing it on the sofa in a bad way.  
“I was expecting you to throw it directly into the fireplace!” Jessica says, as she is really standing in front of the fireplace, turning her back to the flames.  
She wasn’t joking when she said her butt was freezing. No matter how warm and heavy her jumper could be, it’s too short and barely reaches her tummy.  
  
Jessica has solved the problem of freezing, but there’s another, more worrying one.  
  
- _Goddammit, he’s bare-chested, again!_ -  
  
“No way, my darling, I could never throw it away. After all, it’s still a gift from yours.” He explains, reversing the sweater to the right side and folding it with great care. “As long as it keeps as far as possible from my skin!” He adds, making her laugh.  
  
Jessica’s problems increase when Kevin reaches her at the fireplace. Well, since he’s half naked, he probably needs it more than her.  
  
The crackling flames light his face up, now relaxed, with an innocent, genuine smile on his features.  
Twisting her torso from her position, Jessica notices that and many other things, such as the short hair that veils his chest, his abs just outlined on his lean build that is so appealing anyway.  
Stretching her neck a bit more, Jessica can see the leather brown belt that keep his trousers up, trying to figure out which hole he stopped the buckle in.  
Kevin realises he has the girl’s eyes on himself and turning abruptly he confirms his theory.  
Jessica immediately glances somewhere else, feeling very awkward.  
  
Kevin smiles to himself.  
  
\- _Oh yeah, sure, you hate me, I’m a despicable person, I’ve ruined your life and everything, and yet you don’t disdain to have a look. Oh, Jess, if only you admitted that, I could do so much more than simply making you look at me!_ \-   
  
“You’d rather cover yourself if you don’t want to catch a disease… not that I would give a shit!” Jessica’s cold tone keeps his sexual fantasies at bay.  
  
The fascinating persuader doesn’t let himself down anyway.  
  
“You would, hell yeah you would!” He sing-songs, boastful, before going upstairs, coming back only when he wears the dark blue cashmere sweater, the one Jessica has seen on his armchair.  
But Jessica is not at the fireplace anymore, nor in the living room.  
  
He hates losing sight of her, although it doesn’t make sense, since it’s Jessica who decided they had to spend the whole day together.  
  
“Jessicaaaa!” He calls her out, while he walks through the corridors.  
  
“Why are you screaming? I’m here!” She pops out from the kitchen that she has already managed to find and make it hers.  
She’s holding a red bowl with all the ingredients for the stuffing that she is blending with a wooden spoon.  
  
Reaching her, Killgrave can see on the table a turkey she managed to thaw, a couple of bowls with some preparations, a sort of pie with a not very reassuring look and several kitchen tools; but the thing that catches his attention the most is the black apron Jessica is wearing with a hot pink written on it.  
  
“Super Cook?” Kevin reads out loud, between amused and sceptical.  
“Yep, so what? It’s a gift from Trish, to motivate me.” She explains, telegraphic, placing the stuffing on the table to deal with the turkey, that she cleans with a wet sponge.  
  
“That’s not motivation. That’s only a big, big lie.” Killgrave says aseptic.  
“You’re such a asshole!” Jessica growls, showing him the middle finger.  
“I remember very well whenever I allowed you to cook and it never proved to be a good idea.” He insists.  
“This time it will be!” She swears, inserting furiously a hand inside the turkey’s cavity, ripping off its entrails.  
  
Maybe she’s daydreaming about doing the same to Killgrave and he must think the same thing, because he immediately changes attitude.  
  
“Well, no doubt about it, that’s remarkable!” He compliments her. “Have you already done it before?”  
“Nope, but if you recall well, once I’ve ripped a head off a corpse with my bare hands. Compared to that, this is a piece of cake!” She shrugs, taking the bowl with the stuffing.  
  
Kevin steps closer to her, leaning against the wall, with his arms crossed at his chest and a smile full of admiration.  
“You never cease to amaze me, Jessica Jones!” He praises her, before pointing out a relevant fact. “A whole turkey just for two people? Isn’t it a tad exaggerate?”  
  
“It can’t be Christmas without the turkey,” she strikes back, inserting in the turkey’s cavity the stuffing made of carrots, potatoes and sausage. “It’s symbolic. It means that your staff will have to eat something different for the next days.” She goes on, taking the bottle of oil and the spices.  
“I see it more like an unfair punishment than an unexpected reward.” Kevin can’t hold his tongue.  
  
Jessica throws the eggs beater against him, but he’s quicker and ducks in time.  
  
“We’re susceptible, aren’t we?” He chuckles, as he watches her spreading the oil all over the turkey.  
She also spread the salt, the spices and she began massaging the turkey, sort of vigorously.  
Killgrave is not chuckling anymore, too bewildered by what he’s staring at.  
Also Jessica notices that.  
  
“What the…. fucking stop looking at me like that!” She grows nervous.  
“I can’t. It’s just so erotic!” He murmurs with hoarse voice.  
  
“What? You, shitty pervert!” She snaps, stopping her activity. “If it really turns you on to be smeared with oil, spices and then baked, let me know, I can please you!” She immediately turns his libido down, making fun of him in order to freeze the sexual tension between them, because truth is that she is also beginning to feel it and she needs to defend herself in every way she can.  
“This is not what I was thinking about and you know it!” He retorts, while, after cleaning her hands, Jessica is ready to bake the turkey.  
“Oh, I know very well what you were thinking about. Forget it, it’s never going to happen. I’m not here for that!” The detective points put, grabbing him by his wrists, rudely.  
  
“What are you doing?” He scoffs, getting free, only because she isn’t using her super strength.  
“We’re done here. We… you did a fucking nothing! I’ve worked my ass off to cook!” She grumbles, taking off the apron and throwing it on the marble counter.  
“Here’s my Princess, directly from Oxford!” He rolls his eyes. “If you wanted help, you could have asked…”  
“For what? I already thought about the turkey, I have prepared the pudding two days ago…”  
“Wait a minute… _that_ is supposed to be a pudding?” The charmer asks her, pointing at the deformed pie.  
  
Jessica decides to ignore him.  
  
“The shortcrust pastry for the _mince pies_ is in the fridge, I’ve already prepared their stuffing at home…” she goes on with her recap.  
“I don’t know if I should be grateful to you for that… of just bloody terrified.” He grumbles.  
“If you don’t quit it, I swear I’m going to shove your head under a stand mixer!” Jessica threatens him, pissed off.  
  
For a moment Killgrave is almost tempted to reply with ‘Why? Does it mean you even know what a stand mixer is?’ but truth is that he loves living way too much.  
  
“Okay, there’s no need to do anything else here for now, let’s go.” She drags him downstairs.  
They’re back in the living room.  
  
“I got you. You want us to relax a little on the sofa, don’t you?” He purrs.  
“The hell I want that! I want you to look behind the sofa.” She instructs him and he obeys.  
  
Finally the persuader notices something he hasn’t seen before.  
  
“What are all those boxes?” He wonders, curiously, starting to unwrap them.  
  
In the smallest one he finds a tree-topper, in the others a pedestal, another part of the structure, lots of branches and leaves in synthetic material and tons of Christmas decorations.  
  
“Oh no, you can’t be serious about this….”  
“Hell yeah I am. This time you’re the one who is going to work hard.C’mon, build the Christmas tree, I saw a ladder behind that door.” She instructs him, before laying down on the sofa, not lifting a finger anymore.  
She’s behaving as if she was at her home.  
  
Kevin loves seeing her like that, because he wishes with all his heart that one day, maybe a day not so far, that could really become her home. _Their_ home.  
  
“I see you want me to follow all these stupid traditions, one by one!” He snorts, as he begins fitting the pieces.  
“Yep, inexorably.” She confirms, grabbing a magazine from the table and starting to flip through the pages. “We’re going to decorate it together, once you’re done.” She promises, letting him work.  
  
\--------------------------------------   
  
To build the Christmas tree doesn’t shake Kevin much, it’s a do-it-yourself activity like any other one, something he has few manual skill, that’s true, but somewhat he manages to deal with that, without asking anyone for help.. which is a not irrelevant news to him.  
Once Killgrave put the tree topper on that eight feet tall Christmas tree, even Jessica compliments him.  
  
The hardest part comes when it’s time to decorate it.  
Not when they place the garlands. To make him happy, Jessica managed to find also purple ones.  
It’s when he starts to hang the Christmas balls, the stars, the pine cones, the angels and all the rest that he starts having some trouble.  
A Christmas ball sleeps from his hand, fortunately there’s a soft impact that keeps it whole.  
The problem is that it’s Kevin who is about to fall to pieces.  
  
He goes to a catatonic state, staring at the tree, still lackin decorations for at least ¾ of it, in deep silence.  
Even Jessica notices that.  
She is decorating the other side and when she doesn’t hear him talking anymore or rather complain about how kitch is a plastic Christmas tree and how stupid the decorations are - she grows suspicious.  
She pops from the fake branches and leaves and sees him standing still, staring at the few decorations with teary eyes.  
  
In a heartbeat she’s behind him, her hand on his shoulder, not to hit him, but to pat him.  


“Hey, what’s wrong?” She murmurs in a sweet tone she probably never used, not even when she was under his mind control.  
  
It’s enough that light touch to shake him a little from his numbness.  
  
“I have never trimmed a Christmas tree anymore. The last one was when I was nine year old. Mom never bought the decorations wholesale, she preferred to create them on her own and she prepared some cookies to hang there, but they were as hard as marble, She was a total disaster in cooking, you remind me of her in that. And dad… he wanted to create a special polish, every year it had to be more and more efficient, because our tree had to be the greener, the brighter one. And he succeeded, every time. I hung my toys on it and stuck the trading cards of the Rugby players.” He begins his tale, taking a short break. “Can you picture a scrappier Christmas tree than that? With sweets practically impossible to be eaten, sprinkled with a spray that surely might be toxic… and full of stuff that had nothing to do with Christmas… but it was our Christmas tree and we liked the way it was… with all its imperfections.” He sighs. “I miss those imperfections so bloody much…” He barely adds, with a broken voice, due to all the emotions.  
  
Here’s the too human Kevin, again, that Kevin Jessica doesn't know how deal with.

She does something she would have never imagined, and even less would Kevin.  
She hugs him from behind. She wraps her arms around his waist and holds him tight, without saying anything.  
  
She is not hugging Killgrave, the responsible of Luise and Albert Thompson’s death, the self-serving sociopath who always reaches his goal, no matter what.  
She is hugging Kevin, who has lost his parents long before and, if for a short moment he believed he had found them again, feeling that stab he saw his fragile hope shattering, as crumbly as never were the cookies of the person who stabbed him.  
  
“Thank you.” Kevin murmurs, parting from her to look in her eyes.

“You know what? One year I trimmed the Christmas tree with the flasks of whisky and an embarrassing amount of miniature liquor bottles you can find on airplanes. Do you want to trim a tree like this? Maybe you need it.” She tries to cheer him up.  
  
And it works, because Kevin is smiling, again.  
“No, no, traditional trimming is okay. I swear I won’t have hurtful moments anymore.”  
  
And he keeps his word. After half an hour of work the Christmas tree is done and Kevin can watch it without feeling hurt anymore. Maybe it’s because that’s a different Christmas tree, a tree he really hopes he will see even next year: that’s Kevin and Jessica’s Christmas tree.  
“Pretty darn good!” She approves the final result.  
  
“Can we check my staff? Maybe they woke up, it’s already Midday.” The owner of the house suggests.  
“Why? I’m not enough for you?” She teases him.

“Quite the contrary, my darling, I want just and only you,” he murmurs. “But it’s Christmas, so, if they are already awake, I can do much better than make them spend a whole day crowded in a garage.”  
“Such as?” She grows curios.  
“What time is it now?”  
“12:20 p.m.”  
“Watch this, baby.”  
  
Killgrave fumbles a little with his mobile, searching for number and then he dials it, activating the speakerphone, so Jessica can hear everything.  
  
“It’s _Amarone_ , good morning and Merry Christmas!”  
“If you’re not the owner, hand the phone to him. If he’s not there, find him somehow, but make me speak with him.” Killgrave skips the small talk.  
Probably the owner must be there, because a minute later someone else is speaking from the other side of the receiver.  
“It’s the owner speaking, please, Sir, tell me how I can help you.”  
  
\- _Geez, it doesn't get more handed_ _to him on a silver platter than that_.- Jessica facepalms.  
She is not used yet to see Killgrave displaying his power at such a distance.  
  
But Killgrave decided not to use immediately his power with the man.  
  
“Would you have a table free for twelve people, today around 1:00 p.m.?”  
  
The owner of the restaurant almost laughing at him.  
  
“Excuse me, Sir, I hope you’re aware you’re asking me that on Christmas day! We’re already booked out, it’s obvious.”  
  
Jessica keeps silent, staring at Killgrave who winks at her, before speaking again.  
  
“Oh, but I’m not asking you, I’m ordering you. Set a table for twelve people, they will be at your place around 1:00 p.m. and you’ll offer them an exhibition of your best Italian cousin. It’s on the house, obviously.”  
  
“Of course, Sir. It’s on the house. We’re going to prepare everything, we’ll be waiting for your guests at 1:00 p.m.” The owner replies, almost lobotomized.  
  
Killgrave ends the call satisfied, staring at Jessica, as proud as a child who has just finished reciting a poem on the chair  
  
“So you can do that even by the phone, can’t you?” She frowns.  
“It’s astonishing, isn’t it?” He sneers. “But it’s only because that restaurant is within ninety meters from here, remember?” He explains, placing the mobile back in his pocket.  
  
“Okay, time to see if your employees are awake, otherwise the _Amarone_ will have a large, empty table.”  
  
They are awake. All of them. And it’s almost paradoxical to Jessica see Killgrave giving them a day of freedom.  
She observes them better. Saving the blows she gave them to knock them down, none of them seems emaciated or having any psychological or physical deficiency.  
There are no sign of violence on them, nor a terrified look.  
  
\- _So has he been really treating them like human beings during these six months?_ \- Jessica can’t help wondering, as she observes carefully the charmer.  
  
Without resorting to any command, Killgrave informs them about the restaurant he booked his way.  
He just adds a hint of order to make sure they all come back to him the day after and then he lets them go, stunned and joyful.  
  
“This doesn’t even sound like you…” Jessica says, really impressed.  
“Jessica, you’re making me discover that I enjoy using my power even when there’s no benefit for me. Quite the contrary, I’ve just lost my cook!” He grumbles, disappointed in the last part.  
“You don’t need any cook, you have me!” Jessica brags, going back to the kitchen.  
  
Not that the dough is sitting, she can prepare the _mince pies_.  
Everything seems perfectly fine, but when she bakes the sweets in the second oven, the turkey inside the first oven starts to catch fire, quickly.  
  
“Oh fucking shit, noo, noo noooooo!” The detective curses so out loud that Kevin rushes to her.  
He had remained in the living room, leaving her alone.  
  
“You see, Jess, my cook would have never done something like this.” He retorts, but with a very calm tone, leaning against the doorpost, as he observes the flames inside the oven.  
“What stupid powers you have! Can’t you order this fucking turkey to fucking stop burning?” She snaps.  
“Hey! Don’t blame my powers! Blame your superpower of being a super disaster inside a kitchen!” He strikes back, slightly amused.  
  
“Don’t you stand still, without doing anything, help me!” She exhorts him, as the flames increase.  
“No bloody way! Maybe if it happened before, when I was still wearing that awful jumper…”  
  
Jessica knows which card she has to play with.  
It’s not about superpowers, it’s simple feminine strategy

  
“Oh, if only Luke was here, he would dive into the flames with such bravery, to recover my poor turkey!”  


- _No shit, everyone would be able to do that with his bloody power!_ \- Killgrave rolls his eyes, before feeling the sting of jealousy, no matter if it’s already a closed chapter.  
  
“Get away from there!” He growls, rolling up his sleeves.  
He moves Jessica away from the oven and armed with wet washcloths he deals with the oven, recovering the almost fully burnt turkey, among some scalds on his fingers and some lucky moves.  
“Oh, thank you so much, my hero!” Jessica sarcastically apostrophizes him, before sending him back to the living room.

  
She has a lunch to prepare.  
Around 1:00 p.m she calls him out.  
She tried to set the table in the best way possible, with a refined table-cloth, ceramic dishes, silver cutlery and crystal glasses.  
Too bad everything is displayed in a messy way.  
  
Kevin surely appreciates her efforts, reaching her as she services the unlucky turkey.  
“I’m afraid your refined palate will have to grant me some clemency.” Jessica recuses herself.  
“How much clemency?” Killgrave glares at her.  
“A lot of clemency!”  
  
\---------------------------------------------   
  
“To recap, you were right about the portions, since the not carbonized part of the turkey was enough only for two,” Kevin says at the end of their lunch, if they can call that thing a proper lunch.  
“I’d better not say anything about the  _pudding_ , about the  _mince pies_ , well… they taste only of Brandy, which is not a bdd thing at all!” he adds, taking another pastry.  
“Maybe this is the only good thing I managed to cook!” She sighs, demoralized, grabbing the unpteenth stuffed sweet, appreciating its high alcohol content.  
“I don’t think so. The salad was exquisite!” He compliments.  
“No shit, Kevin, it was prepared salad.” She mopes even more.  
“It means you can open an envelope, pour its content inside a bowl and dress it.” He sinks his blow, before the final one.  
“Jessica…”  
“Yeah?”  
“You know that compared to what I ate, or I’d better say I  _didn’t eat_ today, that second-rate sandwich inside the soundproofed cage was a  _Gourmet_ dinner?”  
  
TBC  
  
_This chapter had everything inside it: humor, some h/c (Hope you liked the Christmas part tree <3 ) , some UST (did you notice that? Between those two it’s inevitable <3 ) some masterchef stuff, too, lol XD_  
_I guess that Jessica being a disastrous cook is something canon, I’ve read it in many fics , lol and probably saw that in season 2 too XD Probably Krysten can be next Masterchef USA, but surely can’t Jessica, lol_  
  
_Hope you’ll like it, but feel free to tell me everything._  
_Next chapter will be the last one, with more stupid traditions ;)_  
  
_p.s. If you also love Good Omens, check the prologue of my crossover with JJ called ‘Ineffably Inevitable’, chapter I is on its way ;)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter had everything inside it: humor, some h/c (Hope you liked the Christmas part tree <3 ) , some UST (did you notice that? Between those two it’s inevitable <3 ) some masterchef stuff, too, lol XD  
> I guess that Jessica being a disastrous cook is something canon, I’ve read it in many fics , lol and probably saw that in season 2 too XD Probably Krysten can be next Masterchef USA, but surely can’t Jessica, lol
> 
> Hope you’ll like it, but feel free to tell me everything.  
> Next chapter will be the last one, with more stupid traditions ;)
> 
> p.s. If you also love Good Omens, check the prologue of my crossover with JJ called ‘Ineffably Inevitable’, chapter I is on its way ;)


	3. III: AKA Santa's improbable helper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The funniest chapter ... and probably even the most romantic one? ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> still without a beta, I apologize for my bad English :/

[](https://imgbb.com/)  
  
  


**Chapter III: AKA Santa’s improbable helper**  
  
“If you’re done denigrating my cooking…” Jessica snorts, bothered, as she is clearing the table.

“I guess I’ll never be done denigrating your cooking!” Kevin strikes back, scornful, earning a glare by the brunette.   
She abruptly takes his plate, pretending to be clumsy and almost pouring the leftover upon him.  
“Watch your mouth, you could also denigrate my waitress skills!” she gets the last word in that little verbal battle of theirs.  
  
Kevin leaves the table, maybe to avoid Jessica’s other trickeries, maybe to help her to clear the table.  
She’s rather amazed when she see him taking a bowl to the washbasin.  
“Huh, no, leave it to me, don’t worry, I swear I won’t blow your dishwasher up!” She jokes.  
“Uhm, I don’t know, you’re way too kind with me…” He grows suspicious. “You’re planning something!”  
“Oh, you bet I am! I’ll allow you an hour of rest, then you’ll have one more task.” She announces to him, before he leaves that room, devoured by curiosity… and anxiety, too, knowing her.  
  
\- _Bloody hell, what have I gotten myself into?_ \-   
  
\-------------------------------------------   
  
“No, no, no , no and, for the last time, NO!” Killgrave lively protests as soon as Jessica draws out of a box an unmistakable red suit, a white wig and a fake white, long beard that match the sleeve edge, the pants edge of the suit and the hat edge.  
“Don’t be a baby!” Jessica ignores his complaints, throwing at him that suit he hates so much. “I’ve tried to look for a purple one, but I couldn’t find it anywhere and there was no time to try to dye it.”  
“It’s not a bloody matter of purple stuff!” He points out, still clearly disgusted.”It’s a matter of… oh, c’mon, I have a dignity!”  
“Not today!” she strikes back, peremptory. “Besides, if you think about it, I’m even too good. I could have taken you to the _Rockefeller Center,_ among tons of people, instead it will remain strictly confined inside a little park near my house. In the afternoon there will be plenty of families with their children.”  
  
“You said children, didn’t you?” Killgrave retorts, grimacing so much he contorts his features.  
“Oh, yes. Children who will be extremely happy to have a chat with Santa’s helper and thank him for the gifts they’ve received.” Jessica heralds, adamant. “And don’t you forget I have this.” She reminds him, showing him the sophisticated taser she still keeps in the pocket of her jumper. “So, don’t you try anything funny. I’m determined, and very very fast.” She subtly threatens him.  
“I know, I know.” He snorts, giving in, as he starts to remove his belt and lower the zip of his trousers. “Well, you also must be very, very horny if you’re going to stay here, enjoying my striptease!” He makes his snide remarks and doesn’t miss his target.  
And his target immediately blushes.  
“I’ll be waiting for you at the front door, hurry up!” Jessica grumbles, leaving the room quickly.  
  
Just the time of a pleasant walk and they reach _Dewitt Clinton Park_. They cross the gates that lead to the park, they pass under the arch-shaped red structure, skirting the fountain with the coloured frogs.  
Among the leafless branches of all the trees along the path, the sunlight that filter through it creates an amazing play of lights, which reflects on the icy ground.  
Wherever he’s watching, a Killgrave who’s wearing a very unusual outfit can only see families with their children all around.  
The families are not so many, maybe six or seven ones, but it’s very rare that each one has an only child.  
In conclusion: there are way too many children who are running towards Kevin, not caring if they could slip during their run.  
Judging by the way he’s dressed, no wonder why they’re so attracted to him.  
  
“Jessica; i don’t like being here. Please, let’s go away.” he grumbles, feeling awkward, as they’re sitting on a bench.  
“I’ve never said you would like it.” The detective states, adamant.  
“But this is not even one of the stupid traditions!” The charmer protests.  
“Don’t you think I’m perfectly aware of that?” She sneers, even more evilly, before the most intrepid of the kids steps closer.  
  
A curly kid, nothing more than six years old, with big, curious, hazel eyes.  
  
“You’re Santa Claus!” He exclaims, excited, but then he scrutinizes him better. “No, wait, you can’t be him, you’re too skinny!” He rectifies, disappointed.  
  
“Oh, look what brilliant detective we have here!” Kevin mutters, rolling his eyes. “Hey, Jess, why don’t you hire him in your agency?” He whispers at her, before turning to his little listener. “Yep, you’re right, I’m not Santa, so why should you ever waste your time with me?” He says, making an effort not to make it sound like a command.  
  
However, Jessica is ready for her countermove.  
  
“That’s right, kids, he’s not Santa Claus, but he’s one of his helpers! He was with Santa tonight when he brought all those gifts to you. C’mon, run here to thank him, you can even sit on his lap!” She urges the little crowd.  
Before they assault him, Killgrave turns to Jessica mouthing the sentence ‘I will kill you.’  
She bends over his ear.  
“You love me too much to do that!” She whispers, checkmating him.  
  
\- _Geez, this is so true!_ \- He recognizes, before finding sitting on his lap just the first kid who talked with him.  
  
A brave pioneer.  
  
Jessica is a bundle of nerves, standing, on edge, ready for every of Killgrave’s unpredictable reactions, but there’s no need for her to intervene.  
  
“So, what do you want, whelp?” Killgrave asks the kid, a little rudely.  
  
The kid grins madly.  
  
“You brought me the _XBox_ and just the videogame I wanted, you rule, Santa’s helper, thank you!” he pats the man’s thigh, before jumping off.  
  
It’s the turn of a little girl around four years old, with golden curly hair, who gracefully sits on Killgrave’s lap.

  
“Hi, Santa’s helper, I really, really loved the doll you brought to me, even the coloring book with the giant box of crayons and markers… but I had asked for a unicorn!” She murmurs, opening wide her blue eyes.  
  
She is so sweet that, for a single moment, Kevin is almost tempted to go searching for a horse, paint him with non-toxic colours and stick and ice-cream-cone on the forehead of the animal, just to make that lovely little girl have her unicorn.  
He reforms in time, still a little puzzled by what he felt.  
  
“Maybe next year, little Lady, mm?” He grumbles, clumsy, filling her with happiness, before putting her down as delicately as possible.  
  
One by one, all the kids approach Killgrave and more or less he seems to bear surprisingly well all those interactions that are far beyond the usual limit of human contact he can tolerate.  
He doesn’t dare to say anything, not even when an overweight kid sits on his lap, putting a strain on his oh so puny legs.  
Jessica can’t help but chuckling watching that whole scene.  
  
“Hey, kid, don’t you want to say anything to Santa’s helper?” Jessica turns to a skinny child, with his back on her, all engrossed kicking the bark of a tree.  
Not the most praiseworthy hobby.

The kid is around seven years old. He turns towards them, passing a hand through his messy brown hair and approaches to Killgrave, scrutinizing him with his big, dark brown prying eyes.  
The kid looks very, very disappointed.  
  
“That he’s an idiot! That’s what I want to say to him!” He growls, kicking his shin.  
“Ouch!” Kevin snaps, but Jessica is already after him.  
  
“I mean, you and you boss are blind, maybe or you don’t know how to read a letter properly, do you? I didn’t want the shitty train, I wanted the toy cars track! This Christmas sucks and it’s only your fault!” the child snaps.  
  
Killgrave glares at him so much that the kid seems to feel a coming soon threat.  
  
“Once you get home, you’ll play with the bloody train, because you have never received a more beautiful gift in all your short life. Now you can go, behave, stand still and silent until you leave!” he orders and, as it’s easy to figure out, the kid does exactly what he’s been told.  
  
“Don’t you even dare to tell me anything! You know better than me I did nothing wrong and that bratty whelp was the bloody king of bloody tantrums!” Killgrave justifies, turning to Jessica.  
  
She doesn’t take any measures because he’s right.  
  
“After all, you’ve been the king of tantrums as well!” She makes him notice, before going on with the round of the kids who wants to approach Santa’s helper.  
  
In half an hour they’re done and every kid had their turn. Jessica and Kevin are on their way to leave.  
  
“Wait!” a woman runs towards them, making them stop.  
“You had such a lovely idea to make the kids have fun. Usually you have to bear hours of rows in the trade centres for stuff like that, instead this way everything has been more spontaneous and beautiful.” The woman congrats.   


She must be one of the young moms.  
  
“We wanted to do something nice.” Jessica cuts it short, but the woman seems to have eyes only for that oh so atypical Santa Claus.  
“Excuse me, are you available also as baby-sitter? David has never been so quiet!” the woman explains, pointing at his son who happens to be just the brattiest one, even if now he’s as hyperactive as an amoeba.  
  
Kevin stares at the woman among being insulted, amazed and bewildered but it’s Jessica to speak for him.  
  
“Trust me, you don’t really want to do that. Anyway, tomorrow, by this time, your kid will be as bratty as always.” She explains. “No offence, I mean!”

“No offence, of course!” The mom laughs. “By the way, David is okay, isn’t he? I mean, he keeps standing still there, all alone, without even saying a word.” she grumbles, growing concerned.  
“Huh? Nooo, don’t worry, he’s just playing the Quiet Game, Kevin is so talented making the kids playing it!” Jessica justifies him, when she actually would like to strangle him.  
“It’s exactly how she said. Trust me, once you tell him you’re going home he’ll surely recover.” Killgrave reassures her, utterly certain of what he’s asserting.  
  
“Oh, I’m sure you’re right.” She trusts him, indeed and then she turns to Jessica. “Your husband is fantastic, I can tell he’s got skill with children!”  
“Ohhh, no, believes me, he’s not my husband, not at all!” Jessica points out, between awkward and huffy.  
“Not yet.” Kevin smiles mellowly, taking off the fake beard, since the kids are not paying attention to him anymore.  
  
“Oh, young lady, don’t let him get away. You’re such a lovely couple!” The woman beams at them.  
  
“My dear, dear Madam, I have the feeling that you and I will get along very much.” Kevin practically grins. “If you want, I can come to your house for free, to handle your child… locking him in a clo… errr.. I mean, teaching him some discipline!”  
“Well, I’m afraid this is not going to happen. We’d better go now, we still have so many things to do!” Jessica intervenes, dragging him away with her.  


“I’m sorry, Madam, my soon-to-be wifey disagrees, maybe next time!” Kevin turns to the woman one last time.  
“Call me ‘soon-to-be wifey’ once again and I swear I’ll stick the taser up to your ass!” Jessica growls as they leave.  
“if you try do that in my bed it could even be interesting!” He catches her off-guard, tossing her a provocative look.  
“Oh, shut the fuck up!” She rolls her eyes. “Anyway, what was that thing about you locking kids in closets?” She frowns, growing suspicious.  
“Huh, nothing. I wa just saying…” He shrugs, playing it cool.  
  
On their way to Kevin’s house, in a window of a bar nearby, Jessica and Kevin notice two familiar faces.  
“But those two are…” Kevin starts.  
“Yep, it’s them, those jumpers can’t fool us.” The detective confirms.  
“How can the still wear those awful things?” Kevin wonders, disgusted.  
“I guess their jumpers is the last thing they’re thinking about.” Jessica chuckles, already figuring out what’s happening.  
  
After all, Trish and Malcolm are so engrossed talking and looking at each other, as they’re holding their hot chocolates between their hands that they seem to ignore the rest of the world, including the two curios people outside who are spying on them.  
  
“Let’s go, before they see us…” Kevin suggests. “Mostly before they see _me_ , do I have to remind you how the hell I’m dressed?”  
  
\----------------------------------------   
  
“You know, Kevin, I have to recognize that today you really behaved… although I dreaded the worst with tha bratty kid!” Jessica recaps, as she enjoys the last slice of pizza Kevin kindly allowed her to had.  
For dinner, they have resorted to a pizza delivery that works even in that particular day.  
  
“That’s what I’ve tried to tell you, more than once. If you had already improved me as a person when you almost left me to die, after the bus incident… that night at the dock has been even more cathartic.” He confesses, fidgeting with his pizza crust, before he finds the courage to look at her in the eyes. “If you don’t toy with my feelings, if you believe in me for real, Jessica, I can be a better man. I want to be a better man.”  
  
She listens at him very carefully, but she prefers not to say anything, she also try to immediately change subject.  
  
“It’s past nine p.m., what about ending the night with a movie? I’ll pick the one we’re going to watch.”  
  
She walks towards her bag, where she draws out a certain DVD.  
The cover is already a program in itself.  
  
“This one, maybe it will help to put some Christmas cheer in you.” She decides, inserting the DVD in the player.  
  
“More Christmas cheer?” Kevin complains, but he’s already sitting comfortably on the right side of his sofa.  
“I’ll never put enough of it in you!” She strikes back, sitting on the left side and pressing ‘play’.  
  
Many Christmas songs, surreal adventures and tons of good feelings later, the movie ends.  
  
“That composer was so feared, respected, sophisticated, determined, he was in full control… I really don’t get it, how could that simpleton win? He lacks elegance, any kind decency…” Kevin shakes his head, disappointed, turning the TV off.  
  
“Because villains never win, get this through your head!” Jessica sticks her tongue out at him, putting the DVD back to its case. “It’s almost eleven o'clock, I’d better go.” She mutters, gazing at her watch.  
  
Kevin gets up, leaving the room, only to come back a few minutes later, holding a rectangular box, wrapped in an classy golden paper.  
  
“Exactly. Christmas is not over yet, and you still have to receive my present.” He murmurs, handing the box to her.  
  
A little bewildered, Jessica accepts it, starting to unwrap it.  
  
“There’s something I didn’t tell you yet. When I asked Patsy to bring you there, that morning, well… it’s not the only order I gave to her.” The gorgeous persuader reveals.  
  
“Another order?” Jessica got defensive.  
  
\- _I knew it! Everything was just too good to be true. I wonder what that sadistic bastard is planning. At the very least, he’s going to make me fight against my best friend and there’s a fucking weapon in this box!_ \- She panics but doesn’t show it.  


“Do you remember when you were trying on every sort of cloth in the dressing room? Well, it’s me who forced her to involve you in that thing that seemed just an innocent and funny game… instead Patsy took pictures of every item you wore and she sent them to me. She kept sneaking pictures and you didn’t even notice that.” He goes on with his explanation.  
  
\- _Well, it’s taking the long way around to inform me that I have to fight to death with my sister…_ \- The detective frowns, deciding that she should just open the box.  
  
“I was interested only in the evening dresses, but you would have grown too suspicious, so I mixed every type of dress, so no one would have stood out and I would have reached my goal. There was a particular dress and when you tried it on… wow, I figure out it was the right one.” He concludes.  
  
Jessica lifts the lid of the box, finding something she perfectly recalls: a very elegant red dress, with a matched golden purse.  
During that weird game with Trish, when she tried on that dress, she has looked at her reflection in the mirror, daydreaming of being on a red carpet. She looked fabulous in that, but the price tag of four numbers made it prohibitively expensive. Besides, she knew they were just playing.  
  
But now she’s holding that beautiful red dress, long, with a little train, with very short sleeves, barely under the shoulders with extremely decent see-through effects on the decollete and legs.  
  
“Oh my god, Kevin…” She remains speechless, scolding herself for the awful things she dared to think about him a few minutes before.  
  
\- _Well, he doesn’t have to know about it._ \- She decides, while she keeps staring at the dress.  


“That’s exactly the reaction I wanted from you.” He smiles. “Would you mind to try it on? So I can see it in person, not just in a picture.” He hazards, already expecting her rejection.  
  
“Well, that is the least I can do for you.” She murmurs, leaving the room with the box.  
  
Like every obsessed perfectionist, Kevin takes advantage of those few minutes to climb the ladder and fix the Christmas tree in the spots that didn’t convince him much.  
  
When she’s back, he almost falls from the ladder.  
  
He usually calls Jessica ‘a vision’ but in that oh so sophisticated dress, she is, for real.  
  
Besides, there’s something different, something that missed in the picture Patricia sent to him.  
  
“But… you’re smiling,” he murmurs, incredulous, going off the ladder in order to reach her. “I didn’t even ask you to do that… and you wouldn’t obey me anyway.”  
  
“I’m smiling because _I_ want to smile.” She reassures him, radiant. “Kevin, I didn't even give you a real present.” she grumbles some seconds after, feeling… remorse?  
  
Killgrave steps even closer, taking her hands in his and oddly she doesn’t try to break free.  


“You’re right. You cracked my door, you deprived me of my staff, you made me wear awful items, you humiliated me in every possible way, you made me have an horrible lunch, you put me in all the most awkward situations I can recall, you turned this day into a living nightmare… and yet this is the best Christmas of my life.” He murmurs, smiling at her in the sweetest way she has ever seen.  
  
Jessica parts from him, in order to go change her dress.  
She comes back in the living room, holding the box under her arm.  
She’s still wearing that awful lare jumper that Killgrave hates, but, deep inside, he likes her even that way.  
  
“You said I made you spent the best Christmas ever, didn’t you?” She rhetorically wonders, placing the box on the ground, in order to walk towards the box with the left decorations.  
  
She draws out a purple garland and walks sinuously back to Kevin who is staring at her, bewitched.  
  
“Let’s see if I can make it even better.” She winks, wrapping that garland around his neck, as if it was a scarf.  
  
He doesn’t know what she is planning, until she pulls him by the edges of the garlands, taking him with her under the Christmas tree, just in the spot where the mistletoe is hanging above their heads.  
  
“I thought you hated it!” Kevin teases her.  
“And I still do; but, you know, I just have to follow every of these stupid traditions!” She chuckles, before wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him for a little longer time than the tradition usually requests.  
“Now I really have to go.” She says, gathering all her things and wearing her jacket.  
  
“Jessica?” He calls her before she reaches the door.  
“Yeah?”  
“If you think about it, I have the pictures of what you wore that morning. All of them. I could blackmail you for ages!” He sneers.  
“I’ve filmed you, the whole time you were with those kids, wearing the Santa Claus suit. Don’t start a war you’re already going to lose!” She checkmates him, making him laugh, before she leaves.  
  
As he observes her from the window, Kevin has only a goal in his mind.  
  
\- _Well, well, Jess, now let’s find the perfect occasion to make you wear that dress!_ -  


THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, actually there would be a third story, called “Stupid new year!” , but maybe I’ve already bothered you enough with my stuff and shouldn’t post it ^^’
> 
> Kudos and cookies for you if you figured out which movie they watched.
> 
> If you enjoyed the reading, pleease, let me know, even if you didn’t, of curse ^^’
> 
> Thanks for your time
> 
> Lu

**Author's Note:**

> Uhmm so you reached this point without closing the page with a horrified face after reading the first paragraphes?  
> That’s good, then ^^’
> 
> I really have no idea how I managed to write this…. this thing *using the same tone Kevin used to describe the Christmas jumper (which, by the way, is soooo lovely!)*
> 
> Did you notice any (Tennant) reference? ;) I’ll put another tiny one at a certain point ;)
> 
> I laugh too much picturing Kevin who sings the previously mentioned Christmas song and turns everyone into prophets who climb mountains and hills XD
> 
> I don’t know… probably the ending of Season 1 (*sighs :’((( ) mixed with the Christmas magic (that I hate but I love reading/writing about, lol) made me want to write this fluffy (and I hope funny, too) thing… trying to make the characters as believable as possible, despite the absurd situation!  
> Oh, c’mon life needs some lightness sometimes ^^’  
> Feel free to tell me whatever you think … or two throw me vegetables … maybe not rotten ones, lol!
> 
> If you like those two in a more serious scenario (and nc 17 rating) check ‘24 hours’ and its sequel ‘My way’ ;)
> 
> Still need a beta, by the way, don’t be shy if you want to help ^^
> 
> I really thank the images around Google because they’re so damn inspiring and also allowed me to create a very explanatory covers, it could contain spoilers! ;P
> 
> Please just let me know if I should bother keep translating or you decided this is just crazy enough ^^’
> 
> p.s. if you love both 'Good Omens' and 'Jessica Jones' stay tuned... a crossover could be on its way ;)


End file.
